Even the best of friends have their fair share of issues. We are here to let you know that these struggles are completely normal. What matters the most is how you get through those problems. Here are five totally common struggles that most friendships go through at one point or another.
1. Long Distance Friendship: Your bestie moved across the country to pursue her career, and while you are so proud of her, you miss her like crazy. This is one of the most common problems for us post-grads. Whether you moved or she moved, moving often results in a crazy busy new schedule, a new group of friends and ultimately, less time for your friendship.
What do you do? It is crucial to make sure you still make an effort to catch up with her regularly. Pinpoint a weekly time that works best for you two to chat, where you can fill her in on your new job, life, and friends. Once you have that time slot figured out (when she’s on her way home from work and you are cooking dinner), catching up will be as easy as making time for your favorite Housewives show.
2. Jealousy: Your friend just landed a huge promotion at her company as an account executive, and you are still an intern. It’s hard to not let that crush you and compare yourself to her. You have to remember that you and your friend have different situations, are at different companies (usually) and comparing yourself to friends (or anyone else for that matter) is about as useless as Cher without Dionne.
What do you do? This one is a bit harder to overcome, but you need to be happy for your friend. If you truly care about your friend, you should be happy for her, no matter the situation. You would want her to do the same for you.
If the situation is reversed and your friend is the one jealous of you, try to be mindful of what she is going through. It’s hard to see someone so close to you surpass you professionally, in your love life or family situation. Try not to talk about your new big role while she’s sensitive and just know that she will get over it and, deep down, is happy for you.
3. You’re at different places in your life: So you both graduated college, you got a 50 hour/week job, and your friend still goes out to the club three nights a week.
What do you do? It’s okay to be at different points in your life. It’s also okay to politely refuse to go out with her every night of the week, but make sure she doesn’t think you’re just blowing her off when she invites you. Suggest other ways to hang out: going to dinner, a movie, shopping, etc. Suggest something you both like to do, and allows you to be in bed by 11 if you have work the next day. The activities you do together WILL change after college, and you’ll both adjust.
4. Money: Your friend doesn’t want to go shopping or to the movies because she doesn’t have any money, and you’re sick of staying in.
What do you do? Staying in and watching TV is not the only cheap option. There are tons of things you can do for free – pack a picnic and head to the park, go for a jog, take advantage of the free pool at your local park, or check out a fair/festival in town.
5. Your friend only spends time with her S.O.: Your friend got a new boyfriend and all she wants to do is spend time with him.
What do you do? Make it a point to keep asking your friend to hang out, even if she says she’s always busy. If she’s always spending time with her boyfriend at night, then ask her to hang out during the day or ask her to bring him along to see a movie. It’s best that you get to know him if you think he’ll be around for a while. I know it feels like being flexible for her new boyfriend is unfair and you want to make a point, but be understanding. We have all been (or will be) there at one point or another. New relationships are easy to get wrapped up in, so cut her some slack. She will stop hanging out with her man 24/7 soon and be your bud again.
Have you ever gone through any of these struggles with a close friend? Tell us about it in the comments below!